Fun With Words

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are the 2009 winners:

1. /Cashtration/ (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. /Ignoranus/: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. /Intaxication/: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. /Reintarnation/: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. /Bozone/ (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. /Foreploy/: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. /Giraffiti/: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high

8. /Sarchasm/: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. /Inoculatte/: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

10. /Osteopornosis/: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

11. /Karmageddon/: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

12. /Decafalon/ (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

13. /Glibido/: All talk and no action.

14. /Dopeler Effect/: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

15. /Arachnoleptic Fit/ (n..): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

16. /Beelzebug/ (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

17. /Caterpallor/ (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.